Saturday, December 29, 2018

HOME

We drove back home yesterday in all-day rain. That's exhausting. However, it gave us a tale of divine providence. The day before we left Chattanooga Adam bought new windshield wipers for our van at Advance Auto Parts. We'd need them for the 12 hour drive, plus the old ones were dry and scratchy. Fairly soon he noticed one wiper seeming to slip, and I heard it smack the windshield (or something?) occasionally, but it continued to work for hours of driving. We stopped twice for Adam to check it, fiddle with it, reverse it. Nothing seemed to make it right. Finally, somewhere in the middle of North Carolina (I really don't know where exactly), as I drove along, it came apart at last, while I was flying down the interstate. Yikes! I'd been using them as little as possible (which is scary enough), and now I quickly turned them off. "Done with that!" I said in a panic, and hunted for the next exit, which was only a few hundred yards away. I zipped down the exit ramp, looking for the first parking lot so Adam could get out and fiddle with that wiper again. It was a big exit; I had to turn right at a light. There was a car dealership. Then there was a McDonald's. I chose that. But as I'm nearing the burger place, I notice the store next to it: Advance Auto Parts.

Granted, there are quite a few Advance Auto Parts stores in North Carolina. Still, to me this was a situation of obvious divine assistance, and I was very grateful God popped in, at that moment, and said, "Yep. I'm here. Taking care of a little need. A windshield wiper. If I'll care for you this way, you can trust me for the big stuff." Or, as Jesus said it, "Your Father knows what you need before you even ask Him." And, "How much more will your Father in Heaven give good things to those that ask Him?" I've been asking a lot lately, but a windshield wiper wasn't on my list.

Alright, here's a comparison showing what changes I made to the orange wreath this morning as I painted in the peace of my studio. Here it was before:
 And here it is now:
Subtle changes -- more background green, lost more little green branches, lots more red berries. 

Now begins my resting time (I hope) of the year. Winter hibernation. I'm not at the farmers market this morning, although it might have been a good morning for sales. But I need a break at some point, mostly for the sake of mental peace and deeper creativity. I need to write, and paint, and work on my gourd-painting too. Adam and I both find this little farm and our life here to be very calming and peaceful. That's a nice way of saying that it helps us in our struggle against constant anxiety and regular depression. I could probably benefit from a psychiatrist, or at least a therapist, and a bit of medication, but I'd rather use painting, music (lots of gentle music), chickens, working in the greenhouse, and puttering and fiddling around in my studio. I plan to get back to spinning wool again too. Beginning each day with a good dose of Scripture reading is my good medicine too.

Some weeping prayer this morning as I sit and read the miraculous Word. We are such a broken world, such broken people. I feel we are all walking around this planet, crumbling away as we go, trying to do some little thing with our lives. Meanwhile there is beauty and peace to be had, if we choose it. I pass my days plucking from my brain all the dirty evil thoughts, sad images, blowing out the accumulating muck and filth from this life, and simultaneously put in their places bright, small joys, sprigs of hope, and soothe the dryness of unhappiness with the balm of divine promises. The weeping helps too. Weeping at night; joy comes in the morning.

May you find peace and joy in the quite after Christmas as we all step into the new year.

7 comments:

Lisa Richards said...

The wreath is fantastic! I've been fighting the same battle with depression. I guess it's been lifelong and I just hadn't admitted it. Scripture and talking with God help me the most, but I think the creative outlets can help us keep our thoughts in a good place. God bless and prayers!

Carolyn said...

I know that wreath. Yours is nearly as lovely as the original. The pine cones pop off the page!

GretchenJoanna said...

Solitude and creative pursuits seem to be the God-given therapies for depression and anxiety. I'd hate for you to use a doctor or medications to help you get by with less contemplative time! My prescription: Hibernate away!

Love,
GJ

FlowerLady Lorraine said...

Very encouraging post this morning. May you be blessed with peace and God's continued blessings on you and Adam.

Love the story about the windshield wiper. Our God is totally awesome.

Happy 2019 ~ FlowerLady

Granny Marigold said...

Thanks for being so open about your tendency to depression and anxiety. It's an on-going battle for me and this dark cold time of the year does nothing to lessen it. Neither does the problem of the unfixable roof leak.

Henny Penny said...

The wreath is beautiful! I worry too about the shape the world is in. The way people are now days. It really gets me down at times, especially when we have days and days of cloudy rainy weather. I really need lots of sun in my life. Being able to get outside helps a lot. Happy New Year to you Adam. I love the windshield wiper story.

Deborah Montgomery said...

I, too, am looking forward to hibernating a bit after a busy, busy fall and December. I know what you mean about needing quiet, creative pursuits to help with depression. And I have been getting bronchitis 2 to 3 times a year. I need to not feel guilty about living a quieter life. I'm glad you have pleasant and lovely occupations there on your farm. xo