Thursday, September 24, 2015

Considering Jobs

I asked Adam this question this morning: "Have I ever had a job that didn't stress me out?"
He laughed and said, "No."

Why is that? Am I a bad, stressy employee? One or two previous employers might say so. Working in the church office (much as I adored my bosses) was stressful in my early 20s. Teaching school (much as a loved literature and teaching) was stressful. I've been doing an after-school program for only a month now, and it is stressful.

I seem to be the common denominator. Is it me?

I've worked at some wonderful organizations, but it's true that when I talk to folks who've worked in Christian ministry for any amount of time, they privately agree with me that there is overwhelming stress in working there. So it's not just me.

A number of years ago I gave up working outside the home, convinced that was the problem; I wasn't cut out for working outside the home. Is that still the problem?

In my family, we've always semi-joked that we Robinsons don't work well for other people. My daddy seemed to handle it well (with effort) for decades. I don't think it was easy. He traveled for weeks at at time, fund-raising, and was "away from the office" and out on his own. He was allowed very much to manage his own schedule, his own work, as the years went along. This must've made it easier for him.

One brother is a self-employed farmer. His brief foray into teaching was quite stressful too. Another brother owns his own surveying business; he's his own boss. Another has said for years that he finds it difficult working for someone else and has been self-employed on-and-off. So .. is this a family trait?

I'd love to figure this out. The only "work" I've really enjoyed and found stress-free is knitting/crocheting/soap-making/lotion-making for the farmers' market. Am I doomed in the job market? Should I give up finding a job that I can enjoy? Should I resign myself to staying home, or is it possible to find a job you really can leave behind, when you come home? It's difficult to enjoy home right now, because I spend all my home-hours recovering from work, or rehashing in my brain the interpersonal troubles from there.

Have any of you had similar problems with working outside the home? Do you have wise advice on this topic? I'd love to know. I need to decide if it's a lost cause to work out there in the big world. Adam, by the way, says my greatest talent is writing, and I should be throwing myself into that, but I have absolutely no idea how to turn that talent into cash, and I'm no good at marketing myself.

I know this is a scattered post. Help me if you can :)


8 comments:

Kezzie said...

I know that I have tended to get stressed in most jobs. I really get anxious if I do things wrong and I often make mistakes. I take things to heart, perhaps you do too!! Could you do tutoring? Like you did with Julia? If you can make money from the soaps, do it!!x

happyone said...

I can relate. That is the reason I was content to be a stay at home mom. : ) I did a lot of volunteering and I think because I didn't get paid, made it fun and didn't seem like work.

Liz Gardner said...

we women just love being in our homes and making them 'home' for us and our families. I would hate to have to go out and be tied to a certain time to be to work, then for so many hours. I did it, loved it, but always hated the schedule and then felt stressed when getting home to try to get back in the 'home groove'………and get caught up. the older I get the less I like any kind of schedule…..being tied to things on a regular basis…..I like the 'free spirit' part. The 'if I feel like it' part is refreshing; being able to spend time with the g kids on the spur of the moment, or have lunch with a friend; people drop over and being ready no matter what because I was home to keep up. Being a home body is freeing and enjoyable. I personally never thought of you as a stressed out person. I just didn't see this in you at Cono. Was I blind?!! Whatever you decide, I hope it's something you enjoy to do. We are good at what we enjoy doing!!!

Lisa Richards said...

MK, is it necessary, financially, for you to work outside the home? I'm naturally a homebody and my entire 11 years of working (after 19 years of homeschooling) have been a daily effort to get myself out the door. I hear some people say they would go bonkers if they had to stay home all the time. I guess there are two types of people? If it wasn't a necessity to work, I'd sure stay home and enjoy creating and nesting. Can you earn enough giving piano lessons? Most good paying jobs seem to involve doing either hard physical work, or stressful things, or both. At least around here. Sorry if this hasn't been particularly helpful. I really feel for you. I'm one of those who are easily stressed over work. I expect more of myself than others do, I think. Praying for you to find a good answer! :)

Mary Ann Potter said...

I see no problem in wanting to be home, pursuing your interests, home-making in all its wonderfulness. We have been raised to think that we women find our true fulfillment in working outside the home. We have been told wrong by the feminists. I taught full-time for 37 years. As much as I liked it, I relished my time at home even more. I am a real homebody now. Farm work is full time, but it is the most delightful because I am HERE.

Dasha said...

Did my comment load? I think not. The gremlins were active😸

Gumbo Lily said...

No advice here except that I think it's great if you can be your own boss (and sell your home-makery things at farmer's market).

gretchenjoanna said...

I can't imagine what kind of person I would be by now if I had had to go to an outside job. Having "outside" kids in my home for day care was hard enough. I can't even run errands every day or I am so distracted all the housework and my mood suffer.

I agree with others, it's the not-being-home that is the biggest issue, or would be for me, not the type of job. Though it's true, some kinds of jobs might be easier than others. I did like menial jobs like the bottle factory, but that was before I was married. Also working in the church garden, but that was very part-time and flexible. I need to have my best self available at home...